No need for an early start today. We caught a cab (despite another Carnival ship pitching up alongside and spewing out another 3,000 passengers) to Macy’s. A very jolly driver, who was convinced that mum was stinking rich and offered to accompany us on the rest of our voyage in one of our suitcases (NOT the first to make that particular offer…). Macy’s New York is The Largest Store In The World. Brace yourself, it’s quite hard work. We basically started at the top and worked our way down, floor 7, then 5, then 4, stopping only to go back up to 7 for a brief Maccy D’s at the feet of Mayor McCheese.

I bought a couple of pairs of trousers, and a couple of tops and three pairs of shoes. Mum also got a pair of shoes. Well, it’s not my fault, there was a sale on. Every time I tried to pay for something, the price went down!

We were shattered by about 2 so we took a cab to Central Park South and sat in the sun having drinks and hot dogs (halal, couldn’t find kosher – quite peppery!). Unfortunately, a bagpipe player, who had obviously been hounded from his home by his neighbours, decided that our bit of the park was the perfect place to practice, so we were forced to leave.

We caught a cab down to Ground Zero, but when we got there, we found that, having argued for ten years as to what to do with the site, they are only now building and most of it was hidden by hoardings. Mum was very upset to see they were building on it at all, and no amount of assurance that the actual footprints of the buildings would be left untouched helped, so we stayed in the cab and returned to the ship.

We have two new people on our table. Nice enough, Sally and Bert, but Scottish, and although Sally is perfectly intelligible, Bert is not so much. He has a very strong accent, a stutter AND he mumbles! Mum and dad don’t stand a chance! Even I struggle and I have perfect hearing! The other couple have yet to show up.